There’s been this glimpse of light at the end of the tunnel. The peek of which looks like I get enough sleep at night, and can wake and have quiet time before the girl announces, “It’s morning!” It’s a beautiful thing…. Except, that it is not always. There are still many nights where I do not get enough sleep for one …or four reasons. And though, my self discipline is improving, I still hit the snooze quite often.
On these mornings I confess, I am usually in a less than chipper mood. There’s something about that cheerful greeting on those mornings, which seem more akin to a rooster crowing at midnight than a sweet voice to welcome the day. It’s not that I’m not a morning person. I really do love the morning. I love getting up early. But, I suppose I just like to do it at my own pace. You get that right?
Anyway, so this particular morning was one of the latter. I had barely crawled out of bed before her morning greeting. I had just cracked my Bible open and took a breath, and there it was: “It’s Morning!” Thud. Her feet hit the floor, and the day was running.
I am now behind. If I’m honest, I was never really ahead. But now I am surely behind. Unable to keep up with all the requests and needs of the people in my care.
I find myself snapping and correcting in tones much harsher than I even want to deliver them. I see the wounded eyes. Those souls just wanted a gentle beginning to their day, just as I wanted a gentle beginning to mine.
I grab for my escape. Just a moment to recharge, and catch a breath. I announce, “I’m heading out to do chores.” I am met with a chorus of voices wanting to join me. Really?! Even after the absolute bear I’ve been they still want to be around me. I huff a sigh, and reroute my plans. Quickly grabbing breakfast orders and making each what they like. We rush through breakfast and into clothes and –Sorry ponies, your breakfast is going to be late.– We eventually all get out the door.
It hits me right about the moment I suck in that first breath of moist winter air that this is precisely what we all needed. They knew. I don’t know why I’m so slow to catch on? We need to be together outside every day. It just works for us. I often feel there just isn’t time. But, the reality is. There has always been time. Sometimes, I just choose not to take it.
My pondering’s lately have been on regrets. Reading things and hearing stories about what people regret, but also, about things that one will never regret. And the latter has me absolutely fascinated. You see, I don’t believe for one minute that anyone can live without regret. We can certainly learn to make peace with our regrets, but the fact is we all have them. What is interesting however, is that we all have the opportunity to do things that we will never regret. Sure I regret being grumpy with my children this morning. But, I will never regret playing outside with them today. I will never regret reading them that “one more,” story. I will never regret saying, “I’m sorry.” I will never regret sitting down and having that heart to heart about their, or my attitude. So, I’m wondering what would happen this year if I paid more attention, and sought to do the things I know we will never regret?
An interesting experiment, I think.
This I recall to my mind, Therefore I have hope. 22 Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not.
23 They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:21-23 21